Cedarville University Yellow Jackets

Nov. 16, 2015

The Blog. "A tradition unlike any other."

This week was amazing. It didn’t end how we had hoped, but I think I speak for most of us Jackets when I say it’s one that we will all remember as long as we remember anything.

Be forewarned - this blog is definitely going to be the longest yet. I feel like every blog has fallen short of fully pulling you all along for the ride with us, but this one especially, though it will most likely be longer than the rest, is going to fall short.

The week started on a Monday, as most do. This particular Monday was a pretty special one. Coming off of a conference championship title defense, we were looking to the Big Dance. We practiced as usual and headed immediately to The Hive to watch the first-ever selection show featuring us Jackets, both men and women.

Quick shout out to Dr. Geist and the Athletic Department - we don’t really know or understand how much you do to make the college athletics experience possible for all of us, but I know that my experience as a student at Cedarville has been incredible and I wouldn’t be able to find what I have here anywhere else. You make it possible and we do appreciate it.

We got to the Hive about ten minutes before the show came on and quickly took over about 60% of the available seating between the guys and the ladies. The atmosphere was a little bit like Christmas morning. We all knew we were gonna get something since we were at least the #4-seed, but we didn’t know exactly what it would be so we had to wait and see. We were given the 4th-seed, as we had expected and hoped and found out that we would be playing Quincy University on Thursday at Rockhurst University in Kansas City, Missouri.

So we emailed our professors, got the little work we could do done in advance where possible and began to pack Tuesday for a 3:30 a.m. departure from campus on Wednesday. Tuesday night we trained for the last time on the game field under the lights. Practice consisted of the much-loved three-team passing, some arsenal possession, and some penalty kicks. Once again, coach invited and encouraged us to get our trash-talk on to make the environment as difficult as possible for the PK takers. In case you don’t know the soccer guys very well, we jump on just about every chance to make fun of one another and this chance was served to us on a golden platter courtesy of the boss so we willingly obliged. For instance, some of us noted the conspicuous lack of any sort of neck to speak of in between Joel "Just Dance" Twinem’s incredible jaw line and hulking shoulders and the conspicuous excess of neck between Bryce "Baby Giraffe" Childers’ shoulders and head. Others stuck to some strikingly accurate impressions, including a chorus of whiny geeeeeeeez’s when Jon "the terrier" Schwien stepped up and a collaboration of high-pitched, nasally jeers as Jon Richard Brown approached the spot.

That night we finished packing, with every one of us swearing we would forget something, and got to bed at a normal time, which meant that we got, at most, four hours of sleep. The general consensus was that there was no way any of us would be able to get to bed anywhere near early enough to actually get anything like a full night’s sleep in Brock so we just banked on having some serious nap time the following day.

Then, after what felt like all of 10 minutes, our alarms went off and, against all odds, braving the fearsome depths of the Cedarville night and directly rebelling against the way of nature, which was calling desperately for us to return to our beds, we made our way to Callan to prepare for our departure. This was sort of a weird time. We were pretty stoked to be going to the tournament, but we were also still half-asleep. The one who had it the worst seemed to be Mikey "Good Morning" Auld, whose face looked like something between a boxer between rounds and a sleepy bulldog. You could almost see the "Back. Up." Written in bold italic caps across every inch of his bearded face.

When the bus arrived, the driver managed to not notice the group of 30+ grown men standing outside a building with a sign that read "Callan Athletic Center," and blew past like Coach Knight at a stop sign. Coach Faro chased him down though and we embarked on our journey to the Big Dance without a real hitch. We got to the airport still bleary-eyed and zombie-like in plenty of time for our 6:30 a.m. departure. As it turned out, we weren’t the only ones who weren’t quite ready to function yet. The gentleman checking our bags and giving us our boarding passes managed to read Lendyn Prickel’s name as "Lenny Pickle," which sounds to me like either the bad guy in some sort of food-based kids show on PBS or a member of the Rugrats. So that was fun.

The boarding process and the flight went smoothly and we arrived in Washington, D.C. for our layover as scheduled, still a less-than-chipper crew, but with the first part of the journey behind us and the Big Dance that much closer. We got some cash from what I like to call the "Bank of Brett" to get some breakfast at one of the airport vendors and spent most of the layover walking around, scarfing our food, playing smashy road, and making fun of everything that moved with the notable exception of - you guessed it - Derek "The Beggar" Braak, who made a bee-line for a corner of the boarding area and passed out for the duration of our layover. The theory currently circulating is that he is, at almost any given moment, the most comfortable person on the team and we have no evidence to the contrary as of yet.

When we got to KC, we boarded a bus that I would have been happy to spend the rest of my life on. The center aisle was laminate wood flooring, the seats were bound with a leather softer than anything I’ve ever had the privilege of touching, the bathroom was about 2x the size of most buses we’ve had (nobody actually used it, I just wanted to check because the bus was so cool), and the entire thing had that "New-Bus" smell. But all good things must end. We swapped the bus for a trio of 14-seater vans, which were very nice, but paled in comparison to the luxury we had just been exposed to and made our way to the nearest Chick-fil-A.

After we ate, we checked into our hotel then headed off to a brief practice to stretch our legs and shake off the cobwebs from the early morning and the cramped traveling. We then had a couple hours of down-time, which some used to catch up on sleep and some used to catch up on work. The next thing we did as a team was play a rousing game of mafia. What you need to know about that is that Greg cheated, Coach Knight thinks that Asian jokes are kinda funny, and Christian is terrible at talking his way out of getting killed.

That night we ate like kings at a place called Jack Stacks if memory serves, which had some excellent barbeque. Some of us also starred in Chris Cross’s Periscope session and quickly learned that we should not be put in front of a camera, but our embarrassment was short-lived since we quickly drowned it in big plates of meaty goodness. Once we all finished the glorious meal we piled back into the vans in high spirits to head back to the hotel and get a good night’s sleep.

Then it was game day number one. We woke around 9 a.m., ate breakfast at the hotel, went on a team walk around downtown KC, and got in a bit of study time to try to stay caught up on the work that was piling up on all sides. Then we got a snack and headed to the KC Aquarium where we saw a LOT of chocolate chip starfishes, a turtle with only three fins that could only turn left, and a few rays the size of the blanket on my bunk. Then it was time for our pre-game meal, which we ate at a Noodles & Co. right by our hotel. We then had a bit of time to ourselves to get our things together before heading over to Rockhurst for our 6 p.m. (local time) game.

By opening whistle, the blustery wind that had been worrying us all day had died down and it was a clear, chilly night. Quincy was a quality team, but we played very well and put our first goal away in the 15th minute from the foot of Zachary "Danny Diaz" Harris. Jon Richard Brown got us another one with his left boot about 7 minutes later to put us up 2-0. We went into half with that score and managed to get JB another one in the 65th minute to ice the game thanks to a bit of a miscue from the Quincy back line. The game ended 3-0, which made it the first ever NCAA tournament win for the Jackets and put us in a pretty great mood for the remainder of the night. Big S/O to the Jacket-Backers who made it out to the game - best fans in the country.

Friday we woke up and had the continental breakfast at the hotel again, featuring some quality waffles and pastries. After breakfast we had a pool recovery session with Coach Grant "Green Light" Knight and some weird folk/dance/indy/club music from Coach Isaac "Father Time" Nelson that had kind of made me want to dance, but also kind of made me want to herd sheep and square dance. It was incredible and I’m still not sure how I feel about it, but I don’t think anyone was surprised that that’s the kind of music Isaac listens to. We had some freedom for lunch on Friday. I ended up going to Potbelly’s sandwich shop with Twinem, Nikerle, Mike Auld, and Isaac "The Dancing Shepherd" himself, but others found a Chipotle and still others hit up Noodles & Co.

After lunch we piled into the vans to go see the College Basketball Hall of Fame, which meant we had games of tips, free throw competitions, and three-point shootouts. We didn’t really learn anything about the history of basketball at the Hall of Fame because we were having too much fun to read anything longer than a sentence or two, but we did learn that Coach Faro’s vertical and Paulo’s shooting form could use some serious work, and nobody on our team has a future in live sports broadcasting. Also, our posse, including some faithful alumni and one excellent RA, who had made the trek out to KC met us there and we caught up a bit in between free throw competitions. When we exhausted the possibilities at the Hall of Fame we headed back to our vans to go have some down time at the hotel to get some homework done before dinner. We ate at a restaurant by the hotel then headed over to the closest theater to watch the new James Bond movie, which was pretty much exactly what you would expect. After the movie it was bed time and game day #2 was bearing down on us.

We woke up on Saturday and had another quality breakfast at the Hampton before another team walk and tactical review session. Then it was time to head over to Rockhurst to play our hosts. This game did not go as we had hoped. Their high-press and staunch defensive discipline ended up being a little more than we could handle after a rest of less than 48 hours from our last game and they had a couple good individual moments, which got them a 3-0 lead by the final whistle that we feel didn’t represent the flow of the game accurately.

But that’s the nature of the beast. In the end, at Cedarville we don’t play for W’s, we play to make God’s name great and I think we did that. The Rockhurst guys were willing to pray with us after the final whistle and handled their success with a good amount of class.

We spent our last night in Missouri at the Childers’ residence (which apparently doesn’t encompass all of Kansas City - who knew?) where we played some video games and air hockey and watched McFarland, USA, featuring Zazz’s soul mate Danny Diaz late into the night (9:30 p.m.). Many thanks to our hosts for feeding and entertaining us.

And just like that the season is over. It feels like it’s lasted forever and no time at all. Some things didn’t go how we wanted, but others were better than we could have imagined. Soccer season is one of the things that we never want to end, but now that it has, you can bet that we’ll be thoroughly enjoying the three extra hours a day that we have out of season.

This blog has already gone way too long (if you’ve stuck it out, you’re either an awesome fan or have way too much free time), but there is still so much more to say. I’ll spare you a bit though and cut to the closing shout-outs, which won’t exactly be short.

Coaches Faro and Knight: I haven’t ever met a pair of men more dedicated to and passionate about their jobs than these two. They might not be the best drivers, but they are excellent coaches who have made this program what it is today in addition to being genuine men of God who constantly challenge us to grow into the leaders and men of God we were made to be. They sacrifice pretty much their entire fall to be with a group of goofy college guys and actually seem to enjoy it, which is a feat in and of itself, but along the way they teach us how to play the game we love and how to live the life we’ve been given.

The parents: You know all too well that we wouldn’t be the men we are without you to encourage us, support us, and tell us when we’re being dumb. You tell us that you’re proud of what we’ve done, but I think I speak for the whole team when I say that we are incredibly proud of our mothers and fathers, who have been our role models and caretakers and friends. Thank you to all of you who made it to every game (The Prickels) and those of you who supported us from afar.

The seniors: Joe, Zazz, Jared, and Paul. I speak for us all when I say it’s been a privilege not only to play with you every day in the fall, but to live life alongside you. This isn’t goodbye since we live about 500 feet away from one another, but allowing the season to end without recognizing you guys before the limited readership of this blog would be unacceptable. Each one of you has had an incredible impact on this program no matter how long you’ve been here, certainly in the Win and Loss columns, but even more in the lives of your teammates everywhere from team showers to team Bible studies. I can’t imagine a better group of guys to grow and play and laugh with. We don’t say it often, but we love you guys and we can’t wait to see what God’s got in store for you after graduation.

Here ends the blog. It’s been an honor and a pleasure to be the blogger for the 2015 season and I hope you got a glimpse of why we really are a team unlike any other.

I Cor. 10:31

Go Jackets!


Nov. 9, 2015

The Blog. "A tradition unlike any other."

And there goes another priceless week. It was one that we thought of this summer when we were all alone and feeling like giving up on one of the track workouts. It was one we’d been waiting for all season. It was a week that every one of our three losses jeopardized and every one of our regular season wins brought one step closer. We had a lot of expectations and hopes leading up to this week about the things it might hold in store and I can’t say we were disappointed.

We started the week with practice on Monday after our #1 G-MAC tournament seeding gave us the chance to take a full weekend off and decompress ahead of a week that can only rightly be described as "massive." Practice was focused especially on continuing to sharpen our defensive mentality and intelligence in preparation for the conference semis on Thursday (11/5) at home against the scrappy, talented Ohio Valley side that made our lives difficult in both of our previous meetings.

Tuesday and Wednesday we continued to prepare, working on our defensive press, our patient creativity in possession, and the specific tactical requirements of our 4-2-3-1 and 4-3-3 formations. These practices were full of Dutch turns, knock-downs, penetrating passes and the usual suspects. At the end of practice though, we took some time to shell our keepers with some well-taken penalties just to make sure we were prepared in case our first tournament game ended up requiring PK’s.

Our game Thursday was at 5:00 p.m., which was a bit of a departure from the norm since our home games are usually at 7 p.m., but all that meant was we had to miss another class or two. We were of course, pretty upset by this, but by the grace of God we made it to pre-game meal right around 1:30 p.m, some of us still wearing our customary home game day shirt-and-tie that undoubtedly increase the number of female fans that we draw for home games. The general consensus (from the four biased people I surveyed) is that we are just an incredibly handsome team. Popular opinion suggests that, on the celebrity handsomeness scale, we fall, on aggregate, somewhere between George Clooney and a perfect 10 (yes, I made up the scale and the units of measurement arbitrarily, but do you disagree?), but I digress.

We had a pre-game film session around 2:15 p.m. that ended up being held in the Athletic Center conference room, which is made for about eight people. There are about 27 on our team. Nonetheless, the session was a success and we went over some mistakes we needed to correct and reinforced some positives from the film. Eventually, we were joined by Conner "I’m Smart-I Swear" Hughes and Derek "Wait, what?" Braak, who, despite being here for about three months, still don’t know their way around campus.

Film was followed by pre-game worship. This is our tradition for every home game. It’s always a blessing to step back and remember who we serve and why we serve Him before going to battle with our brothers.

Then it was kick-off. The weather was unbelievably nice for an Ohio November night and the game started fast. We traded blows with the Fighting Scots for the whole first half, but remained in a 0-0 deadlock come halftime. It wasn’t until the 62nd minute that we finally took the lead with a one-touch finish by Jon "I Now Own A Real Hat" Brown off a cross from Bradley "I Rock Camo Pants" Schluter. After we scored, we still had a lot of work to do. We had some very good chances and conceded a few chances, but held on to our lead until the 87th minute, when Connor "Gameready" Gilmour banged one home by sheer will-power and a bit of luck.

After the game we went downtown to Subway for a team meal with Coach Isaac "Giggles" Nelson and spent the rest of the night doing everything from Theology papers to video games. The other semifinal was won by AB in PK’s, which meant that we would be playing them Saturday afternoon for the ‘Ship.

Friday we had a light recovery practice session that ended with some more penalty kick practice. We split up into two teams. The winner was to have first dibs in the line at BD’s Mongolian BBQ later that night and Coach told us we were permitted, encouraged even, to taunt, jeer, and otherwise verbally maim one another to make the penalty kicks as game-like and difficult as possible. There was some very creative, very personal trash-talking that may or may not have had real impacts on our team cohesion, but the competition was a success because my team won. The bad guys missed two PK’s and the good guys only missed one. Kyle "T-Shirt free since ‘03" Nikerle missed one, but I think it was because he was aiming for the goal 60 yards behind the one we were aiming at, which might make it a little better? I guess? Lendyn "Central State" Prickel got his blocked. Then Paul "The Thoroughbred" Messerly took his cue from Nikerle and sent his shot sailing over the frame of the goal and proceeded to have an emotional outburst that led him to kick every ball in sight as far as he could. The final PK for the win was drained by none other than Rigby revisited (Derek Braak), but it got awkward really fast because nobody was quite sure whether he was celebrating or seizing after he scored. At the end of practice Coach ran us through the schedule for the following day, but almost left out the most important part - "Win a championship," as was so astutely pointed out by Ben "The Doc." Johnson.

That night we went to BD’s, stuffed ourselves and then returned to campus to catch Moonlight Madness, which is always a blast, and get to bed at a reasonable hour.

Then it was game day all over again. We laid siege to Bob Evan’s in Xenia for breakfast and probably put in as many orders for Farmer’s Choice Breakfasts as they had received all week then headed back to Brock to digest until it was time to head to the locker room.

When kick-off arrived it was a clear, brisk day and the Jacket-backers were out en masse doing a great job of being loud and proud of their boys. The game didn’t start as we had hoped. The Battlers put one away within seconds of kick-off on a quick counter-attack, which momentarily took the wind out of our sails. Then they proceeded to hold on for dear life. The Battlers managed to clear two balls off of their own goal line to hold onto their lead and turn aside over ten more chances that we were unable to capitalize on. We finally broke through in the 74th minute with a shot from about 15 yards out by John "Trash-Stache" Schwien. We kept up the barrage until the end of regulation and through both periods of OT, but were unable to capitalize so it went to PK’s.

If I had to tell you what happened in less than five words, I would say "Paulo came up huge." He had two saves, not including one that was disallowed by the referee on a fair, but somewhat nitpicky call. We didn’t miss a single one of ours and won ourselves a G-MAC championship for the third year in a row and it felt GOOD. Really, really good. All credit to AB, a good number of their players came to midfield to pray with us after the game and they took the tough loss with a lot of character.

There were a lot of smiles to go around on our part though. Even Coach Faro let a little one slide across his face by accident, which was a bit disconcerting, but it ended up being just fine. As I sit here writing about it, it’s all a bit of a blur, but I do remember that it was one of the most satisfying game days I’ve been a part of and I know that our boys earned every bit of it.

The W also pretty much clinched our spot in the Big Dance for the first time ever in program history, which means we will have at least one more week and one more game together. We find out Monday night (11/9) who, when, and where we will be playing in the first round so keep your eyes and ears open!

We have a few shout-outs this week.

First, the Prickels - for being angels who were there literally every game of the season. These are excellent people.

Second, the fans - you guys are obnoxious and we love it. Keep it up.

Third, the Lady Jackets - congrats on getting an invite to the Big Dance yourselves!

Go Jackets!


Nov. 4, 2015

The Blog. "A tradition unlike any other."

Another seven days have come and gone here in the village and we’re another seven days closer to what we’ve been working toward all year long.

The week got off to another unorthodox start. Late Monday morning we found out that our final home game of the season, which was scheduled for the following day against Ohio Dominican University, had been cancelled in an attempt to preserve our field and our players for the upcoming G-MAC Tournament. Needless to say, this doesn’t happen often so it was a bit of a shock. Later that day we met and went over some film instead of training, a decision by coach that was much appreciated by our joints, which pretty much all feel about 30 years older than they are right now.

In our meeting however, we learned that we would be training the following morning at 6:00 a.m. Now I don’t think I need to tell you that most of us don’t tend to wake up that early so it was definitely a bit of a struggle, but on the other hand, at this point in the season, having settled into our routines and rhythms, sometimes it’s good to shake things up even if that means waking up two hours before God in His sovereignty chooses to start the day. At training that day we got the chance to open up and play a bit with more numbers than we typically do since we had no games upcoming, which is always a good time. As players we understand the importance of the drills and patterns that we work on, but I think I speak for everyone when I say there’s not really anything as fun as actually playing.

We trained the following day at the Athletes In Action facilities in Xenia in an attempt to further preserve our practice field after what seemed like an eternity of rain and gloomy skies had softened it to a consistency somewhat akin to the swamps of Florida, the home of our very own Greg "You Should Have Worn Ankle Guards" Williams and Sean "Thank You Very Much" Reilly.

Thursday we were back on our own field continuing to work on our urgency in possession, creativity, and tactical acumen as we had the previous days. One of the major themes of training throughout the course of the week was patient urgency, which basically means that we really want to score, but we also really want the ball, but we want to score more than we want to have the ball so we have to balance the two. It’s a fluid concept, and one that we’re still working on every day.

Friday was a heck of a day. After starting off practice with our typical passing pattern and arsenal possession, we got to scrimmage the JV team. These games are always pretty interesting for everyone involved because of the relationships we have with the guys who live in our halls and the friendly rivalries and whatnot, but also because at this point in the season, as I mentioned earlier, any chance we get to change up the routine is more than welcome.

But, in the words of my main minion Paulo Henrique Dos Santos De Soto Ronaldo Billy Firmino Diniz De Souza Pinto, the night was "a child."

Later that evening, we had our annual team costume party and let me tell you - we outdid ourselves. Some of the highlights included a very realistic South American Kingpin (Big Papi), a group of individuals from The Purge, Rocky and Rambo, Mario and Luigi, a very handsome pair of minions, a pretty pitiful dinosaur, a rather weak Robin, and a surprisingly friendly, but also surprisingly accurate Joker (this last one was kind of confusing to be around and more than a little scary). Coach and Mrs. Faro, our gracious hosts, decided to be a lunar eclipse and Coach and Mrs. Knight somehow rustled up some beekeepers’ outfits and a bee costume for baby Liam. I personally thought this was really well done by the Knight family, but the joke may have flown under the radar for those whose sniffers aren’t quite as finely tuned as the Plumdog’s.

The main event of the night was the pumpkin carving competition. And what a competition it was. The Faro’s garage, the official locale of the activity, was abuzz with plans, secrecy, and the typical dose of testosterone that is inevitable when a men’s college soccer team does anything mildly resembling a competition. As the pumpkin carvings flew through the air and our carving utensils flew through the pumpkins, there was more than one casualty. Bradley "Pre-K" Schluter barely made it out with all his digits intact and Jon "Spandex Sidekick" Schwien suffered a near fatal wound that he managed to fight through. On the other hand, Joel "I’d Rather Be Lifting" Twinem almost turned out to be too strong for such fine detail work as we were undertaking when he nearly sliced his pumpkin in two with the first flick of his musclebound wrist. So it was, to say the least, an eventful night.

The pumpkins turned out excellent, with more than a few drawing some high praise. These included a silhouette of Braak’s pitiful dinosaur costume, a minion, a Volkswagen hippy van, something we affectionately called a "demon pig," and, of course, a Spider Man mask because there’s always one. The winner turned out to be none other than a tribute to the strength and prowess of the Newman bloodline hand-carved with a box-cutter and dull pair of scissors by Jon Schwien and myself. I think it’s fair to say that we were given an outside chance to win at best, but we rallied around our common birthday and the fact that there was absolutely no pressure because we were the underdog to literally every other group in the event and we shocked the world. All credit to my partner who not only came up with the original idea, but fought through serious injury to see it become a reality. You were a great sidekick, buddy ;)

We’ve were given a long weekend with Saturday and Sunday off from official team activity, but got back at training Monday preparing for the G-MAC Tournament.

To whom it may concern, we will be hosting the tournament as the #1 seed and our first game will be Thursday night at 5 p.m. here in the land of the free and the home of the Jackets. If we manage to take care of business in conference, it looks like we’ll be going to the Big Dance, which is pretty stinking exciting.

S/O of the week goes to the Junior class chaplain, who I’m pretty sure spends most of his time in the 70’s because I’ve never once seen him on campus and he looks and sounds like the grooviest dude this side of the Atlantic. The brother brought The Word.

#futureglory

Go Jackets!


Oct. 27, 2015

The Blog. "A tradition unlike any other."

And then there was one…

We had our third- and second-to-last games of the season this week and I think it’s fair to say that most of us are caught a little bit off guard by the fact that we have our last regular season home game on Tuesday. (Editor’s Note: The final game against ODU was cancelled on Monday, Oct. 26).

We started this past week as a team a little differently than we normally do with a film session/team meeting on Monday afternoon in place of practice as a way of recuperating physically and mentally from the adventures of the TN/KY trip over Fall Break. Then, come Tuesday we were back out on the practice field working on possession and movement in tight spaces, passing, and other Cedarville soccer staples in preparation for our Thursday home game against Salem International. The sessions Tuesday and Wednesday were, as always, demanding, exciting, and a great time for us to escape from the world together as a team and focus on the game we love.

When Thursday came around, we were all raring to go for our second shot at Salem, who has a few very good players and a few very big personalities. We came out at the whistle and dominated, scoring our first goal, the first of Joel "The Family Man" Fullmer’s career, about five minutes into the game. After that though, we seemed to ease off a little bit and performed less than our best for the rest of the half. However, we managed to go into half up 2-1 with another goal off of a set piece by Paul "The Lab Rat" Messerly. After half, we still seemed to be in a bit of a funk and allowed Salem another goal around the hour mark, which, in case you’re having trouble keeping track, put the game at 2-2. By this point we were pretty frustrated by the combination of our own under-performance and minor misfortune and Salem’s very good performance, but were still unable to totally snap out of it and pull ahead again.

Until…

Zachary "Please Keep Off Of The Track" Harris scored another clutch goal for us in the 89th minute with an assist from Jon "It’s Not a Lovely Day-Please Stop" Brown. The real highlight of the night was immediately following the goal though, as Zazz, in the fever of his celebration, charged off toward the present alumni, likely intending to leap majestically into their adoring arms screaming and laughing. But sometimes even the best laid plans of mice and men go awry. And I guess Zazz’s plans weren’t even the best laid so we can’t be all that surprised, but I digress. He almost made it to liftoff, but just before he jumped, the laws of physics rudely intruded and sent him awkwardly careening straight into the concrete wall at the side of the track rather than over it. A lesson for you kids out there - cleats weren’t made for concrete. Personally, I found it a little humorous that the one guy that has a pair of shoes for literally every outfit, situation, or day of the week/month/year was betrayed by his footwear. It made for a bit of an underwhelming and awkward moment, but we were up 3-2 so we moved on. The game ended with that score and we got another W at home despite our less-than-stellar performance and a downright ugly celebration.

Friday we were back at practice doing our best to recover and prepare for another tough test the next day against Ohio Valley’s revamped program. We got in a good training session and the day almost passed away uneventfully until Coach "Nope" Knight had to go and drop a classic Coach Knight one-liner that made even the usually austere Coach Brett "Anything Else Coach?" Faro crack a smile mid-sentence.

All of a sudden it was kickoff on Saturday. For those of you who were so faithful as to sit through the intense weather, you know that when I say "it was raining," I am dramatically understating what was really happening, but nonetheless it was raining. The first ten minutes or so the downpour was so dramatic that I had visions of the last stand for the fate of Middle Earth at Helm’s Deep in Tolkien’s classic trilogy and the game was a little frantic, but we eventually settled into a bit of a rhythm despite the Fighting Scots scrappy play and made their keeper pick the ball out of his net twice. Both goals were scored by Connor Gilmour for his 15th and 16th of the season, which puts him quite a few goals ahead of our next leading scorers. The Scots did not give up by any means after going into half two goals behind, but we were able to put the game away in the second half with three more goals from everyone’s favorite oblivious Canadian Joel Twinem, Paul "The Cheesehead" Messerly, and Sebastian "Big Papi" Duque for his first of the season. The ref pulled his card out ten times during the course of the game, three for us and seven for them, but we all managed to get back to the locker room in one piece ready to celebrate a successful night.

Saturday was also our Senior Night, which is always exciting. Our senior class is all over the map when it comes to personalities, but there isn’t a single one of them that the rest of the team wouldn’t run through a wall for and I can’t imagine how we could possibly find a better group of guys to lead our team through the messy, exciting, painful, joyful, and all around unforgettable thing that is a season of college soccer. With the regular season winding to a close, each game means more and more and this Senior Night was just a miniscule taste of the recognition they all deserve for the blood, sweat, and tears they have invested in us as brothers in Christ and in the program as their testimony to the world.

In other news, the always dreamy Cole "The Puppy Dog" Butaud, is still battling his concussion, which is frustrating to be sure, but if we’re being honest, provides some pretty funny moments for the rest of the team, Ben "The Bionic Man" Johnson is starting the recovery process from his ACL surgery right on schedule and is making the knee brace/crutch combo look better than it ever has, and Joe "Blades" Davison is back from his short-lived hiatus because we all know that knee ligaments are overrated and there was no way he was ever going to miss the end of his senior season. Life is good.

Go Jackets!


Oct. 20, 2015

The Blog. "A tradition unlike any other."

It was another week to remember for your Yellow Jacket men’s soccer team. It saw us in four states, at three different schools (including the land of the free and the home of the Jackets), missing two much-loved freshmen and with one shiny new ACL.

It started like the past few have. Your Jackets spent Monday through Wednesday putting in work in the classroom and on the practice field with this Thursday - Saturday road trip that spans Fall Break on the horizon. Classes were excellent as always and practice, true to form, was full of passing patterns, 10v8’s, and arsenal possession. Ben "The Doctor" Johnson left us Monday night for his home state of Indiana to have ACL surgery on Tuesday. Word on the street is that he actually performed his own operation flawlessly with just a healthy dose of local anesthesia, but we haven’t been able to confirm that one yet.

We wound up leaving the morning of the Kentucky Wesleyan game with our sights on a second straight victory over the Panthers. The bus ride was fantastic as always, but there were two big absences. Cole "I Can Count to Potato" Butaud remained on campus nursing a concussion he got last week and, of course "Jen Bohnson", who was at home in the great state of Indiana following his ACL surgery. When we finally got to KWC after the full day of travel we were greeted by some beautiful weather, which is all the more cherished in hindsight since we got back to 34 degree weather, but I’ll get there later. I’m pretty sure our changing room on the day was normally used as a classroom, which was an interesting experience, but we didn’t let it phase us. Come kick-off we were buzzing and ready to go. By the end of the first half we were up 2-0. The first was cranked home off a free-kick from Loose’n Lazy John Schwien by everyone’s favorite ginger Joe Davison and the second was a PK that Paul "I’m Sorry-You’re Right" Messerly dispatched coolly without giving the keeper a chance.

Post-match, after our showers, we were greeted by some delicious sandwiches from Panera and stayed to watch the ladies put up an excellent fight against the Panthers. The hotel we stayed at that night was fantastic and some of the boys got in a celebratory soak in the hot tub before heading off to bed for the night.

Friday was an incredible day. After our fantastic breakfast at the hotel we got some downtime to rest and get some work done before we hit the road. The movie we watched on the bus ride was The Count of Monte Cristo. What. A. Movie. I don’t know if my words can fairly describe the way it roped us in, but you can bet your bank account that when Edmond Dontes defeated Count Mondego in their final sword fight, we cheered like the Browns had won the Super Bowl. When we arrived at Trevecca, we got a quick training session in then headed to the hotel to clean up and get ready for our night on the town. We feasted that night at the Garden of Olives as a team. Before we even ordered we were asked to perform a surprise rendition of "Happy Birthday" for one of the innumerable fawning females in the building and a certain member of our company was deemed "tasty" by our waitress. I don’t think I need to tell you that we were looking pretty good. But, as Paulo "Two Kilos" Pinto would say, the night was still just a child.

After we had our delicious fare we made our way to downtown Nashville where we took over a local laser tag establishment for a night of some intense team-time. During the course of our three games, we saw the good, the bad, the ugly, and the downright childish and dishonorable sides of our fellow Jackets in the dark maze that was our venue. I think it’s safe to say that we all came out a little scarred, either physically or emotionally, but we definitely enjoyed our time. The front-runner on the night was Jared "The Dart" Newman, who could be heard giggling with childish glee like an 8th grader at a birthday party every time he got a kill. The turnaround of the night was your very own Kyle "Sayonara" Smoker, who went from rags to riches by starting the night as a bottom-feeder and finishing as top-dog thanks to some savvy tactics and a hand from our other import, Sam "Barnyard" Barnard. The disappointment of the night was yours truly. I somehow managed to never do any better than second-last because EVERYBODY CHEATED. The try-hards on the night were too many to count, but they notably included the following:

Coach Knight - who could be heard screaming "America!" and bull-rushing opponents like he was fighting for the stars and stripes.

Coach Faro - who was NOT afraid of tackling and/or otherwise physically assaulting his competitors

Christian "Bootleg" Alexander - who thought it would be a good idea to put his vest on underneath a t-shirt to try to protect himself

When it was all over, nobody was too seriously injured (physically - though I will never trust some of my teammates again), but we were all a little too sweaty to be proud.

Then it was game day #2 of our trip. We had all day to kill so we went back into downtown Nashville to see the sights and maybe buy some keepsakes for an hour or so, hit up Fazoli’s, and headed over to the home of the Trojans early to cheer on our ladies and watch them earn a hard-fought tie. When the whistle blew for our game, we were ready to prove ourselves again and nearly managed to put one away just minutes into the game from Zazz’s right boot. By the end of the first half we were two goals ahead thanks to some great finishes from roommates Joe Davison and Connor Gilmour. In the second half, Joey unfortunately took a knock to his knee that turned out to be a low-grade MCL sprain that will likely put this mainstay of our back line on the sidelines for a few weeks. Our form slightly dipped later in the half and we conceded a goal to the Trojans, but righted the ship with a great finish from everybody’s favorite Canadian Joel Twinem. The game ended 3-1 in favor of the Jackets, but it wasn’t our best performance.

So three games remain, including two big conference games against Salem International and Ohio Valley this week that have very real post season implications. As of right now we have a chance to make it to the Big Dance, but as coach keeps reminding us, we’re taking one game at a time so our sights are set on doing everything we can at training early this week to right the wrongs we committed on Saturday.

Shout-out of the week goes to Kevin the bus driver for being the baddest dude this side of the Mississippi and being able to fit a 50-ft bus into what we all swear was a 40-ft parking spot. The man is a magician.

Go Jackets!


Oct. 13, 2015

The Blog. "A tradition unlike any other."

Another whirlwind week has come and gone here in the 937 and your Jackets men’s soccer program is a win and a loss further into the season.

Training went well Monday and Tuesday in preparation for our Wednesday game at D&E. After our rather puzzling loss to AB over the previous weekend, we were a bit frustrated yet confident in our abilities to right the ship. We worked on our defensive shape and discipline in addition to our normal passing patterns and possession drills and saw energy and improvement each day. So with a couple good training sessions between us and the gut-check that was the AB game, we were looking forward to getting a chance to play again.

We left for the first West Virginia trip of the week on Tuesday night, the day before our game at D&E and spent the night in a hotel somewhere between here and there. First thing in the morning, most of us were visited by housekeeping at an earlier hour than we would have hoped, got breakfast at the hotel, and got in some mandatory study-time before we hit the road.

When we arrived at D&E, it seemed like we were having a little trouble mentally getting off the bus and we didn’t come off to a great start. D&E got a fortunate early goal against the run of play and pretty much held on for dear life. We dominated the game and got some very good chances, but were unable to finish them so the game ended with a 1-0 score that did less than full justice to the way the game went.

This was our second frustrating loss in a row, having had the clear majority of chances and possession. I think I speak for the whole team when I say that one stung a little bit. After the game though, we got a good word from Coach Faro, who reminded us that we aren’t entitled to anything on a given day. Teams in our conference circle their games against us and we can expect their best shot every game. He also reminded us that the W’s and L’s on the schedule aren’t the reason we do what we do. The guys on our team are here not just because they love the game. We do love soccer and we definitely want to be the best every time we step on the field, but we can lose and still find joy in knowing that we magnified the name of the Lord and glorified the One we love.

At training the next day, back in OH again, we licked our wounds and started preparing for our second shot at AB. Thursday was a pretty light, technically focused session, in which we got our legs moving and worked on driving balls through the gale-force winds that are an ever-present companion up at our practice field. Friday we practiced on the football field at the Athletes In Action facilities in Xenia to prepare for another game on turf. For me personally, these practices are always a good change of scenery just like eating somewhere off campus after going to Chuck’s all week is a breath of fresh air.

We left for AB (our second WV trip of the week) around mid-morning on Saturday. I think it’s my civic duty to give a bit of a public service announcement at this point. For all those of you who intend on spending any notable amount of time in the men’s locker room, there is a chance you will be viciously attacked by massive bloodthirsty spiders. I myself barely escaped one such attack by employing all the guile and courage I could muster (on a Saturday morning) while packing my things for the trip. There may or may not still be a large part of that spider on the floor in front of Paul "Does This Have Nuts?" Messerly’s locker. Consider yourselves warned, my fellow Jackets.

The bus ride to AB was a good one. To start the day, we went over the fundamentals of Dodgeball (dodge, duck, dip, dive, and dodge) with everyone’s favorite seven-time ADAA All-Star, Patches O’Houlihan, and enjoyed one of the finest true underdog stories that modern cinema has to offer. Next, we played "Family," in typical Cedarville Soccer fashion, which came down to a face-off between Sean "Scooby-Doo" Reilly and Paulo "Uncle Phil" Pinto.

When we finally got to AB after weaving and winding our way through the hill country, we got in a rousing few games of Gray Skulls, which, as always, were filled with strife, controversy, backstabbing, and a lot of people falsely claiming "I tried." The game itself was a stiff one. We got about six good shots on goal in regulation, one or two of which were saved excellently by AB’s keeper and we held the Battlers to maybe one Shot on Goal on their home field, but we were unable to "tickle the twines," if you will, until we went to Overtime. Zachary "I Could Open Up A Small Shoe Store" Harris, spurred on by the presence of his mentor, the one and only Mitch "Hunting Season" Goodling (who drove four hours to watch us play), got one of the crap goals that Coach Faro had been asking for all day. When he scored, we kinda freaked out. Greg "I Hate Corner Flags" Williams got a little violent and we almost suffocated Zazz. After two disappointing losses in a row, we were overdue for something to go our way and it finally did.

Twinem had a better week this week on the practice field, but he did have some trouble with laundry. Apparently, back in America’s top hat, if you leave about 26 sets of dirty practice gear in a bin together overnight, they get clean. Sadly though, this is not the case here in the greatest country on earth. But now he knows. Also, we’re still working on property rights with him, but we’ll take what we can get.


Oct. 7, 2015

The Blog. "A tradition unlike any other."

This week had its ups and downs.

We started the week with training Monday after having Sunday "off," which really means that we had Sunday to do all the homework we were too excited to do on Friday and game day. Monday and Tuesday were devoted to preparing for Wednesday’s game against Mercyhurst. This meant that we focused on switching the point of attack, quick transitions, balancing our desire to go forward with our need for possession, and finishing (yes, the rest of the team works on finishing too – Connor is just the only one who knows how to do it in games).

We were recognized with our first ever Top 25 national ranking as a program at the start of the week, which we were all pretty pumped about, but in our minds it just put a bigger target on our back so we tried not to let it go to our heads.

On game day we dressed up in our customary shirt and tie attire and did our very best to sit attentively and patiently through a full day of classes with mixed success as always. Mercyhurst has been a very good program for as long as this Yellow Jacket can remember so we were coming into the game expecting a tough match and we got one. The Jackets struck first off of a beautiful assist from Kyle Nikerle to Joel Twinem (who did a little better with his Canadian-American conversions in training this week, but had some other issues that we’ll charitably chalk up to "language barriers") in the 43rd minute. The Lakers hit back in the 66th minute with a 30-yard free kick that was moving in the wind more than Cedar Spray on a windy October day. We had some more struggles, but were able to bag the winner in the 83rd minute in typical "Cedarville" fashion as Jon "Dribble-Really-Fast-In-A-Straight-Line" Brown got to the end line (again) and cut a ball back to Gilly (again) who banged it home (again). It wasn’t our best game, but we got the W and could go to bed without too many regrets that night.

Training the next day was mostly a recovery session, which means Greg "It’s Still A Race" Williams got a solid sprint workout in during warm-up while the rest of the team tried to limber up in the wake of the Mercyhurst game. We also ran some tactical drills to prepare us for Alderson Broaddus (our weekend game). Friday, in addition to being approximately -45 degrees Fahrenheit, was a bit more involved as we got in some solid possession, passing, and finishing. Notably, we also learned during training that even Coach Grant "The Bachelor" Knight has off-days sometimes. We’ll leave it at that.

Saturday was game day and our Homecoming! The weather didn’t give our alumnus the warmest of welcomes with temperatures that never touched 60 degrees, clouds as far as the eye could see, and light rain on and off all day, but they still showed up en masse to back their Jackets. Sadly, we were unable to get them a W, as the Battlers capitalized on their four chances with four goals and we only had two from the feet of Zazz and Gilly. It wasn’t our worst game of the season from coach’s perspective, but we gave them too many chances and they capitalized.

Saturday marked the end of our most recent home-stretch and we’ll be off to West Virginia not once, but twice this week to look for another good result against D&E and to exact revenge on AB. Prayers for safe, mud-less travels would be greatly appreciated.

To whom it may concern, Bradley "Schludacriss" Schluter is officially no longer on the market. Additionally, the weather’s getting colder and the boys have unashamedly broken out the Under Armour leggings. Some, notably a certain Messiah alumni who shall remain unnamed, think they aren’t all that masculine, and maybe they’re right, but those leggings sure are warm. So there.

Go Jackets!


Sept. 29, 2015

The Blog. "A tradition unlike any other."

It was another pair of successful home games for the Jackets this past week.

The start of the week saw us back at training on Monday after a much needed Sabbath day rest preparing for the first game of the week against Trevecca. The Trojans have always been a tough test for us so we were looking forward to another chance to prove ourselves against some stiff competition. This excitement made itself evident out on the training ground, where we definitely weren’t perfect, but we got in two good, competitive training sessions geared toward sharpening our dynamic ball movement and tactical awareness Monday and Tuesday. Then it was game day. Home game days are always interesting in the respect that no one is really sure if it’s really a huge advantage being at home and having four hours of class and homework as opposed to having some downtime on the bus and staying off of our feet for away games. Whether or not the business around campus makes a difference though, it’s always a blast to put our best foot forward in front of a buzzing students’ section of Jacket-Backers so by game time we were ready to go.

The game itself was another 90 minute competition. We came off to an excellent start as Connor "Randy Orton" Gilmour netted his first goal of the day for the Jackets in the eighth minute. He got another within minutes off of a poorly executed back-pass from the Trojans and celebrated by dropping the corner flag with a bone-shattering RKO. Derek "Daniel" Braak then put us up 3-0 in the 20th minute with his first collegiate goal off a cross from Jon "Just go" Brown. It has to be said that we went into a bit of a lull after our third goal as Trevecca clawed their way back to within a goal by the 60th minute, but we finally put an exclamation point on the game as Derek "We Even Have The Same Number" Braak got his second collegiate goal thanks to a remarkably slippery run through the heart of the Trevecca defense. The game ended 4-2, which was a good result, but our inconsistency in the course of the game was frustrating and left us unsatisfied and looking forward to training.

We got back at it in training the next day in order to prepare for our match against the Kentucky Wesleyan Panthers on the weekend. Training was quality for these two days with Dutch turns, Cruyffs, knock-downs, and quick ball movement aplenty. However, it was either a bit of struggle for my roommate, Joel "Too Many Touches" Twinem, to grasp the concept of "two-touch" drills, or the conversion from Canadian touches to American touches wasn’t adding up for him, as he spent the majority of training Friday trying to figure out what coach meant when he said "two."

Then it was game day. We spent the first part of game day as it was meant to be spent, watching Saturday morning soccer, eating, and watching the Lady Jacket volleyball team dominate at home like always. The weather by game time was all we dreamed it would be, lightly drizzling with temperatures somewhere just below 70 degrees, and we came out buzzing. We went up 2-0 within the first 20 minutes (no points for guessing who scored), with goals from exactly who you would expect us to have goals from and the overwhelming majority of chances and possession. We continued to dominate and got two more goals from Cole "Baby-blues" Butaud (the first of his career – assisted ever so unselfishly by yours truly) and Jon Brown (his first also). As the game went on and the temperature dropped, we began to enjoy the drizzle less and less, but the night as a whole was an excellent one. We put forth a consistent 90 minute performance and didn’t allow the Panthers a sniff at our net en route to a 4-0 victory.

No word yet on whether Twinem has learned how to count to two in American, but I’ll be sure to keep you posted in the next installment.

Go Jackets!


Sept. 22, 2015

The Blog: "A tradition unlike any other."

Another week gone and the Yellow Jacket men’s soccer team is a tie and a win farther into their season.

It was a relatively peaceful week for us in contrast with the last one. We had two home games, which meant we were able to actually attend our Tuesday/Thursday classes just in time to remind our professors who we are before the first round of exams and assignments hits us.

Our first game of the week was Tuesday the 15th against Tiffin. Leading up to the game, they were ranked second in our region, which meant it was a game with some real tournament implications. Naturally, we were pretty amped up for this, our home opener against a team that the talking heads had said was our superior. We started the game very strong, going up 1-0 in the first half off of one more goal by Connor "What’s wrong with jean shorts?" Gilmour. We gave up fairly few chances, limiting the Dragons to opportunities off of set pieces. The second half was a bit of a different story though, as we had trouble retaining possession and failed to adequately pressure Tiffin. The result of these factors was that Tiffin was able to dictate the game to meet their strengths and they ended up snatching one back off a set piece designed for their target forward, who was reminiscent of Scripture’s description of Goliath. Sadly, slings and stones are not accepted in competition by the NCAA so there was little we could do to stop him receiving balls in the air. After the first 90 the game went to overtime, in which I think it would be fair to say that we dominated, but we were unable to capitalize on the chances we created so the game ended 1-1 after 110 minutes.

We were understandably pretty spent following the Tiffin game so coach "Fresh Footwear" Faro gave us the next day off from practice. Instead of training, which might not have been a pretty sight thanks to some heavy legs, we held a meeting to go over the game and talk about some things. One of the things we talked about was a trip that the coaches are planning for the team after graduation in the spring. According to the rough draft of the itinerary, we will be going on a 10-day trip to Austria for fellowship, soccer, and ministry opportunities, which sounds absolutely fantastic to all of us.

We spent the next two days preparing for D&E on Saturday the 19th and keeping our heads above water in the rising tide of assignments and exams that were sneaking up on us while we were travelling every other day for the first two weeks of the season. D&E has always put up a strong fight against us so we were expecting a battle and we got one. We went up 3-0 in the first half, but not without putting in and receiving some hard tackles and individual battles. A huge shout-out to our student section here for their passion, horn-blowing, and general ability to make everybody that played for the opponents on that side of the field very uncomfortable.

Also notably, this was our last week of coaching the Cedarville Little Dribblers. We had a game Thursday at the halftime of our women’s team’s game where the Orange Dinosaurs put forth a valiant showing to pull out a victory over the Green Goobers despite some questionable coaching tactics by our very own John "I’m-Never-Happy-With-Anything" Schwien. Our last game was the morning of the D&E game and it was an excellent final game day for our Little Dribblers and coaches alike. The matches were thrillers and the cookies and sweets the coaches received for their efforts was the little glimpse of heaven that all home-cooking is to a hungry college athlete.

Go Jackets!


Sept. 15, 2015

The Blog: "A Tradition Unlike Any Other"

Where to Begin.

We started this week off at Malone (most of us missing the second day of Tuesday/Thursday classes in a row). We came off to another less-than-perfect start in this game, but dominated the game with the clear majority of scoring chances and possession. Chance after chance either missed the frame or was saved by Malone’s keeper, who turned aside quite a few very good chances including one from Paul "Marshmallow" Messerly from the top of the six-yard box. Granted, Paul’s shot had all the venom and power of a shot coming from the foot of one of the 3-5 year old "little dribblers" that we coach, but from that proximity any save is a good one. We played the first 90 minutes out to a 0-0 score so it went to Golden Goal overtime. We ended up scoring in a spectacular fashion as Connor "Did You Lock My Fridge?" Gilmour nodded home yet another goal with less than five seconds remaining on the clock. It was a frustrating game to be sure, but we got our result and improved our record to 2-1.

The following day we spent recuperating from our efforts at Malone and preparing to head to Vienna, West Virginia to play Ohio Valley (where we missed our third consecutive day of Tuesday/Thursday classes). The Ohio Valley game was an eventful one, to say the least. Their program has been entirely overhauled since last year so we weren’t sure what to expect. I think the best word to describe their team is "scrappy." They put up a stiff fight, but with a disciplined defensive effort and goals from Zachary "I Do Homework" Harris and Connor "I Don’t Trust You" Gilmour, we were able to pull out a W as the Fighting Scots added quite a few yellow cards to their already impressive tally of warnings on the season.

After Ohio Valley we had one day back in the ‘Ville to rest and get ready for our third game of the week against Salem International and our second trip to West Virginia in three days. What a day this was. I could write a book about this trip alone, but I’ll try to do it justice in these short lines.

It was a day to remember before we even kicked a ball as Paulo "I Love Bourne and Beaches" Pinto experienced the cinematic beauty of the Bourne Identity for the first time and loved every minute of it. Next, and still before we had even arrived at our locker room, we were greeted by a photo from our game against Ohio Valley in 2013 that featured none other than the late, great, legendary Spencer "The General" Petersheim. Then, in an effort to preserve the rather muddy surface of the game field for the game itself, we warmed up behind one of the goals in an area that could be charitably called "rough terrain." Somehow our ankles made it out of there safely though and we came off to a strong start, putting away two unanswered goals before Salem, thanks to a tremendous individual effort, snatched one before halftime. We went into half up 2-1, but there was still a lot of room for improvement so we came out after halftime guns blazing. We ended up coming away with a dominant 5-1 victory and reasonably few bumps and bruises. We learned from this game that, as conference championship favorites, we will get every team’s best effort…

But wait. There’s more.

One of our five goals was scored by Joe "Drop the Gloves" Davison, who netted his first goal for the Jackets by the very tip of his flaming red locks off a beautiful service from Jon Schwien. This was a big deal folks. The last notable moment of the game came, of course, from the one and only Derek "Wrong Book" Braak. From the vantage point of the sideline, it seemed that while he was dribbling the ball, he suddenly forgot how to run so he chased after it on hands and knees for a good five yards only to be beaten to it by a Salem player that still knew how to use his legs. He claims that there was a shove and a pothole involved in the incident, which, given the nature of the venue and the opponent would make a certain degree of sense, but we all know the truth.

And that was all just the start of the day for us. On the way home we ended up getting our charter bus into a corner of a town that wasn’t made for charter buses so our poor bus driver tried to find somewhere to turn around. An innocent enough beginning, I grant you. However, our attempt to find a spot to turn around somehow took us down a road that was just barely as wide as the bus itself (we still don’t know why he thought this was our best option). So naturally, rather than putting the bus in reverse, we proceeded about three miles down this road in hopes of finding a place that suited our needs. We didn’t find one. We got stuck. For a while. Our bus driver, while valiantly, if misguidedly, attempting to take a pretty tight turn in our charter bus was forced to cut over the edge of a local’s rather hilly lawn and the undercarriage of the bus ended up resting on the ground as our back wheels spun themselves about 1/3 of their own height into the mud. As if it weren’t enough that we were stuck in the mud in West Virginia at 8:30 p.m. on a Saturday, the front of the bus was about 20 yards away from a sign that read "Private property. Dead End."

Like any group of young men would, we tried pushing it out, but we all knew we never really stood a chance. So we called a tow truck service. The first one basically said "There’s just no way. Good luck." Totally understandable, in my opinion. The next guys we called were a little more helpful. When we called them at some time around 9 p.m., they said they could be there in an hour with something that had enough horse power to move our grounded vessel. As it turned out, an hour was an optimistic estimate of the time it would take them to arrive so we spent the next 90 minutes or more shaking our heads in disbelief at our own predicament, laughing with a combination of apathy, amusement, and helplessness, and doing our very best to explain to the locals how we got there without sounding too ignorant. When the truck arrived, they got us out of there in a relatively short amount of time and we were back on the road at some time around midnight with a four-hour drive ahead of us. It has to be said that our lovely bus driver, Lori, was so gracious as to stop at the first convenience store to be found and foot the bill for our entire team, which is no small thing.

In the end, we made it back in one piece and with the entire original Bourne Trilogy under our belts, but none of us were particularly sad to kiss West Virginia goodbye for the time being.


Sept. 8, 2015

The Blog: "A Tradition unlike any other"

Leading up to our season opener against Bellarmine University (9/3), the boys were buzzing with excitement to get the season started. This was the reason we did all those track workouts and training sessions in the heat of the day this summer. It was definitely a struggle, as it always is, to stay focused leading up to the game with assignments coming due in classes and the breakneck pace of life in general as a student-athlete, but we worked our way to a commanding 3-0 victory with a pair of goals from Connor "The Chosen One" Gilmour that have placed him neatly in the annals of the G-MAC at the start of his third year of college soccer. It wasn’t all fun and games though. Bellarmine put up a pretty tough fight and put in some pretty stiff tackles at times. Additionally, the temperature on the newly-laid turf field on which we played easily surpassed 90 degrees and each team had to battle the heat almost as fiercely as they had to battle their opponents.

The day after our season’s inaugural victory, we were back out on our practice field for a training session that was cut short by Kurt "The Enforcer" Beachy. Not to be thwarted by the weather, we proceeded to the gym where we had a tactical meeting in preparation for our game against UIndy (9/5). If you were lucky, you might have seen us, all dressed in navy and gray, standing around brows furrowed, participating in what looked like a very small, very slow 11v11 scrimmage between two teams in identical uniforms on a basketball court without a ball.

We arrived at UIndy and were again welcomed by sweltering heat that could be seen in waves above the black rubber pellets on the Astroturf. This game didn’t go quite as well for us. We came out to a sluggish start and Indy was able to snatch a 1-0 lead in the first half off of a set piece with the wind at their backs. We came out guns blazing in the second half with the lion share of possession and scoring opportunities, but were unable to capitalize before a lightning delay around the 63rd minute mark. After what seemed like an eternity in the locker room waiting out the weather, we got back at it and continued to be the aggressors (no thanks to Bradley "Lincoln Tunnel" Schluter and his suspect defensive effort) without putting one away to tie up the score. Eventually, Indy was able to sneak in a go-ahead goal, which put the tally at 2-0 in favor of the Greyhounds.

The Indy game has left a bitter taste in our mouths that just doesn’t seem to be going away quite yet. However, with three more away games coming up this week, we are not blind to the future. None of us are happy about the way it turned out, but there is a lot of the season still to be played so the group is ready to learn from our mistakes and move on to the next obstacle.

To prove it, we followed up the next day with a team tubing adventure in order to unwind and have a bit of fun. Because everybody knows the Men’s Soccer team doesn’t spend enough time together. Throughout the course of our escapade we learned a few interesting things about our freshman class. First, that Greg "It’s a Race" Williams prefers to float in isolation as he spent the majority of the day either hundreds of feet ahead of the rest of us or flipping every tuber in sight. Second, that Sebastian "The Timekeeper" Duque has much less skill with a tube than he does with a ball as he somehow spent the majority of the afternoon falling into the river. Lastly, that Derek "The True Believer" Braak is just plain and simple too skinny, as he was forced to straddle his tube to prevent himself falling through (classic Rigbytm move).

- Go Jackets!


Sept. 1, 2015

The Blog: "A tradition unlike any other"

And so we begin! The Yellow Jacket men’s soccer team is beginning to settle into the frantic rhythm of another semester and another exciting season. Before we get to all of that though, I should catch you up on what the Jackets have been up to.

When we all got back to campus and caught up with one another, we noticed that our summers all had a lot in common. Pretty much everyone used words and phrases like "busy," "crazy," "too short," "a lot of running (though maybe not quite enough)," and "awesome" to describe their time away from school, but every single one of us was beyond excited to be back. Also, because it wouldn’t be a summer for a Cedarville athletic team if no one got engaged or married, Jared "Gravity Affects Me More Than It Affects You" Newman proposed to the love of his life, Lorrin.

Back to the team. Our first few days here, as always, were a bit of a roller coaster. Everybody got moved in smoothly, which, considering there are 11 new faces on the squad this year, was quite a feat in and of itself. Then our thoughts turned toward "The Mile."

We ran our grueling fitness test at approximately 12:01am on the 14th of August in strict compliance with the NCAA’s regulations. It must be said that the test did not go as well as it has in past years, but we made it through as a unit and, as hard times do, it brought us even closer together.

The next morning we woke with heavy legs and light hearts. With the running behind us, there was nothing between us and the thing we’d all been looking forward to – the opportunity to play and train with the like-minded brothers we love to God’s glory and by His grace. Those glorious, exhausting days of passing patterns, turning boxes, and defensive drills seemed to last forever and end too quickly all at once. The 11 newbies picked up our aggressive 4-3-3 system like they were born for it.

We are now officially done with our three preseason scrimmages in which we chalked up two convincing wins and an underwhelming 0-0 tie. All in all, things are shaping up pretty well for the Jackets and we’re all looking forward to our season opener this Thursday (9/3) against Bellarmine at UIndy.

I would be remiss if I did not mention, before closing, that it seems the late great Daniel "Dang It, Jared!" Rigby has returned for a fifth year disguised as a "freshman" named Derek Braak! This young man maintains that he has no prior knowledge of or association with Riggles, but the jury is still out regarding his true identity.

- Go Jackets!


Aaron Plummer is a junior at Cedarville University from North Olmsted, Ohio and a Dean's List student majoring in business finance.